What is Self-love

Self-love is not about taking a bubble bath or splurging on that expensive perfume or candlelight dinners or getting into debt to buy that expensive car but it is, to be in a place where you are most comfortable, where you are at peace and in state of bliss.

There is a huge difference between happiness and joy or bliss. Most of the time, we humans attach happiness to our goals or material things. We make happiness conditional. Our state of mind is I will be happy when I have X amount of money or when I have that piece of jewelry or when I have the car of my dreams or when I lose X amount of weight or when I get the job of my dreams or when I get a promotion at my job. At times we put in an extraordinary amount of effort just to acquire that new toy so that we can be happy. We even get into major financial debt to acquire materialistic things so that we can be happy. Such kind of happiness does not last long because it is followed by the stress of bad financial decisions or it comes at the cost of health or relationships. This is not self-love. Whenever our happiness is attached to any goal or thing, it will always be temporary. Moreover, if we do not achieve that goal, we do not give ourselves permission to be happy. This kind of mindset can also lead to sourness in the relationship as if something or someone comes in our way of achieving our goal or acquiring that dreamed possession, we consider that individual or that thing as our enemy as it or he/she is in our way of acquiring our happiness.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not telling you to not set goals or not work hard to acquire anything in life. I am telling enjoy the journey which is going to take you to your dream destination. Choose happiness throughout the journey. This will come when you have an attitude of gratitude. Be grateful for everything in your life. Celebrate small accomplishments that lead you to achieve your dreams. Choose happiness even when you are failing by changing your thought process and viewing failures as lessons learned.

Happiness is a way of life. We should be happy all the time. Learn to find happiness in small things just by being grateful for everything you have. Self-love is choosing happiness as a way of life. Self-love is choosing to say no to impulse buying which is going to put you in financial stress later on. Self-love is choosing to say no to that large piece of cake that is loaded with sugar which is going to take you on a guilt trip at a later stage. Even if you eat that cake or choose to indulge yourself with an expensive spa once in a while, at the least have control over your emotions so that you do not go on a guilt trip later on.

Self-love is choosing to love yourself unconditionally and to stay happy no matter what. Self-love is choosing to love yourself as you are in spite of your imperfections and weaknesses. Self-love is choosing to forgive yourself for your mistakes. Self-love is choosing to nourish your body with the right nutrition and nourish your mind with the right books. Self-love is disassociating yourself from negativity and from people who pull you down. Self-love is choosing to exercise even when you feel like being a couch potato. Self-love is choosing to have self-control and choosing to have power over your addictions. Self-love is choosing meditation or exercise instead of going to happy hour. Self-love is above the superficial pleasures of life.

A person who loves themselves truly will always have power over their emotions and will always say no to harmful addictions. Make wise choices by thinking long-term and choose to say no to things that will give you unnecessary stress later on. Fill up your cup with love so that you can pour love into the lives of others because you can only give what you have got.

Comment down below and write down 5 things which you will do to show more self-love.